[.uk] Hornito: My Lie Life (ISBN 0060937106)

Amazon.com Review:
Softly lit, as if by a disco ball and a vintage Lava lamp, Mike Albo's rich and funny novel hinges on his protagonist and alter ego's visit home to suburban Springfield for Labor Day weekend, where he reminisces about his standard-issue American childhood and seeks a remedy for crabs, while obsessing about an unattainable trick of his named Eric, a dancer at Freon in Manhattan: "He is a human candy bar impulse buy--moving effortlessly and beautifully up there with a king-size Snickers down his white cutoffs." There is no plot to speak of in Hornito, but a few events occur to strike off sparks of recollection. The driving force is Albo's unquenchable libido, which leads him into the sex clubs of New York and the dismal local gay hangouts of his parents' hometown, just as it led him into satin shorts and eyeliner during his warped 1980s adolescence. Among the best gay books of 2000, Hornito speaks to the geeky and emotionally hungry boy in even the coolest man. --Regina Marler

I liked it a lot:
This book kicks ass. I'm not really an avid reader or anything so maybe I'm simply not getting something about David Sedaris that everybody seems to be crazy about -- but to me comparing Mike Albo to David Sedaris is like comparing Kurt Cobain to Ricky Martin...it's almost rude...I think Mike Albo is SO much better. This author won't attempt to tickle and grope you into some quirky-cute-NPR humour the way Sedaris does. Mike Albo really just wants to tell you a good story -- and he just HAPPENS to make you burst into hysteric fits of viscious laughter along the way...I really admire this author's restraint and humility...And this book isn't just about humour, either -- HORNITO will also make you chuckle, cry, rage, sneer, sigh, sympathize and muse -- and the author has this crazy talent of effortlessly drawing out all these contradicting sentiments from situations using light, simple strokes -- it's like acrobatic prose -- this in itself is extremely entertaining and pleasing. And, sure...on top of all this HORNITO also reads as BRILLIANT social commentary -- but the coolest part about this book really is that when you finish it the first thoughts you have AREN'T likely to be metaphysics (like "what is the meaning of love/relationships?" "what does it mean to be gay in Amercia?" "what is go-go dancing...???" etc. etc.) -- instead, you are much more likely to close this book and think to yourself: "Gee, I wonder how fat + bloated Todd Flamadio (the bully/jock) is by now...???" or, "I should totally google Jason Hazer (the main character's high school crush)..." I'm not gay -- or even American -- but the characters and situations and emotions in this book still felt so identifiable and familiar and real to me -- when I finished I felt this incredible nostalgia and longing for these times and places that Mike Albo created. I really liked this book.

I just don't get it:
I tried, I really did. I read and read and read this book, waiting to feel that Mike Albo had "talent to burn," like another reviewer said. This is a story about growing up gay, which might seem well-trod but which is always interesting and can be clever. However, I struggled mightily to follow this book. To me it read like a first draft. There are numerous ill-placed flashbacks that drag an already-thick narrative even further down so that it's very hard to follow. Sure, there are mentions of things that will remind you of the times, but it's not enough. You have to care about the narrator and care where he goes in life. The humor here is somewhat subtle and dry, but nowhere near David Sedaris' level. When the attempt at a writing style gets in the way of the writing, it doesn't work.

over the top novel about growing up gay:
Mike Albo's "Hornito" tries to be clever, and a good novel about a perspective that is not often talked about. Mike, the narrator, talks about his various loves, while telling us how bad "crabs" are, and the dreadful treatment of it. We see glimpses of his childhood and high school years, and we cringe. He tells of his job, which sucks. Frankly, it tries to be comic, but it is quite dull.

not worth your time:
This book is not worth reading. If you're looking for a meaningful coming of age story, this is not it. If you're looking for a steamy way to live vicariously through others, this is not it either. Its not much of anything. I'm just waiting for the new Augusten Burroughs in May!!

Growing up and moving on:
In the 1975 documentary "Grey Gardens", Little Edie says, "It's very difficult to keep the line between the past and the present", and that is exemplified in Albo's novel. The main character, also named Mike Albo, comes home for Labor Day weekend to the suburban town where he grew up. This gives him cause to get away from the city and his latest heartbreak, and to reflect upon his past. This book could easily have become a dull listing of sexual conquests and "why doesn't he like me?" whining, but Albo's humor and writing talent prevent the protagonist's musings from becoming too self indulgent. Albo can create a mood and an era, whether he's talking about the late 90s New York scene, or early 80s suburbia. He gets so many details right (with maybe a few anachronisms - the Challenger is mentioned as exploding in 1987) that I felt like I was there in crummy Lower East Side apartments or a tract home. I enjoyed this so much that I immediately went to my local library to find the other book he'd written. Great read for any time of year.